Yesterday was day 4 of the SNAP Experience and I'm doing better than I thought. Although, for the first time ever I've had to brown bag it to my Scottsdale appointments. I had 5 appointments in Scottsdale with about a 2 hour break in between where I usually would have went to a sushi place or went to my friends restaurant LimeLight Dipping Bar and Grill. But I brought my Slim Rite nutritious shake and a half imitation crab meat sandwich with a serving of cream cheese. I don't know if you can really call it a sandwich, because it was on one slice of white bread I got on sale and quite frankly it's stale (which I realized why it was on sale).
For dinner I had a little over $2.00 left to spend for my $12.00 supplement for the week and I used it to buy 2 99 cents Jr. cheeseburgers at Wendy's. At this point I was starving and when my husband kept asking me what I want, all I said was food. I didn't care what I wanted, whether it was healthy or not I just wanted something to help my stomach not feel the way it was feeling. Not to mention that when I was driving, my eyes were a little more sensitive to light and I was feeling light headed. I was focused enough to make it through, but it's not a feeling I want to really feel behind the wheel.
At the end of day 3 when I was sewing at 2am, it really hit hard about hunger and my mom's own hunger story about my grandfather trying to feed 9 children. My mother always told me that in the Philippines, my grandfather use to sell fish everyday. He would buy 50 pisos worth, save two for the family's dinner and sell the rest just to break even. When my stomach was growling and cramping while I was sewing, I was reminded of that story and wondered how anyone could feed 11 people with fish and rice and be satisfied.
My mom also told me a somewhat funny story about a bag of peanuts, which I also thought of when my tummy was cramping. My mom had saved enough money for a bag of peanuts and the bully at school stole them. She was so upset because that was the only thing she was going to have for lunch that she confronted the bully, but she got in trouble for yelling at him. As long as I can remember, I use to think that was funny. Fighting over a bag of peanuts and risking a beating for a bully for it too. And although, I don't fully understand what it means to go hungry, the story is less funny when I think about the daily worries my grandfather endured to be able to feed his family.